Success, Defined By You

Today's Sunday New York Times has a fun article by Jan Hoffman about modern culture titled "The Good Wife and It's Women".It ponders the cultural relevance of the female characters on the CBS show, and how they cope with their careers,husbands,and families.Ultimately, the show's co-creator,Michelle King, says she likes to consider "at the end of these women's lives,what will success mean to each of them?" The shows lead female characters have all been through loss,disappointment,set-backs and betrayals,personally and/or professionally in their law careers. Sometimes we get to witness the characters lives changing,and the character having to redefine success in new terms.

Real life can cause us to reshuffle the deck,and redefine our personal version of success.Many of us change our ideas about success as we grow older.I always encourage the people I counsel and coach to redefine success for themselves.Clearly, money doen't buy happiness. As we age,we realize that time with the people we care about means a great deal.Having the opportunity to pursue things we are passionate about keeps us young and full of life. Even Freud knew that we need two things in life that we pursue with vigor: love and work.

Success may mean living life with honesty,character,a sense of humor,and faith. Many people decide that being the top person in your office has its' limitations. If you spend too much time chasing career success, your children grow up and depart without really knowing you. Knowing how to have work being a meaningful part of your life,but knowing when to set limits with it, is a great skill. Time and sacred space for your partner,your parents,your children,and yourself is essential.

What is your personal definition of success? Take a moment this week to reflect on how your personal definition of success may have evolved over time.Having your own authorship over how you define success gives you clarity to make decisions about how you spend your life,and acceptance that it is ok for you to have your own, independent view of the world on the topic of success.You can do it your way. Now,wouldn't Frank Sinatra be proud?